March 2018
How many of you
at the end of the day say : “Where did the time go? I didn’t get done what I
needed to do. I need more hours in a day!” I think we all wish we had more
hours in the day and could accomplish more with what precious time we have. As
we review our days, we may need to take note of things that may be stealing our
precious time that are inconsequential, time-wasting things that are not
bringing us closer as a family and to the Lord. We all need downtime, but we need
to make sure that we prioritize well and start removing things from our lives
that we truly don’t need.
As we think about
our time, we can think of many things that may or may not detract from the
spirit, but don’t improve us and/or our family. We not only need to review our
lives, but those of our family and those around us as well.
Elder
Donald L. Staheli of the Seventy has warned: “Distractions and
discouragement are some of Satan’s most effective tools. He finds ways to help
us make excuses about why we can’t do this or that. He gets us involved in
wasting our time and resources in things that lead us away from improving our
lives and developing our talents. He blurs our focus by diverting our
attention. This can happen to the very best of you.”
Elder M Russell
Ballard of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles stated: “One of the ways Satan
lessens your effectiveness and weakens your spiritual strength is by
encouraging you to spend large blocks of your time doing things that matter
very little.”
Our lives are surrounded
and inundated with time-wasting activities. Without a review of our lives, it
is so easy to just go along in our busy lives thinking that there is no way to
change or fit one more thing into our lives. It is amazing, though, how we can
find/make time to do certain things that come up that we really want to
participate in, but we can’t fit time into our schedule for things that the
Lord wants us to do. Some items we participate in can even become addictions
and take over our lives without us even noticing.
Elder M Russell
Ballard also reminded us, “We need to limit the amount of time our children
watch TV or play video games [including smartphones] or use the Internet each
day.” Of course, this counsel to limit the time we dedicate to media applies to
parents as well! We can do this by establishing reasonable time constraints for
online recreational activities. Then, if the attraction of the activity begins
to pull us beyond our own guidelines, we can recognize a potentially dangerous
situation and stop participating in the activity. As Elder Ballard counseled,
“Virtual reality must not become [our] reality.”
Elder
Donald L. Hallstrom of the Seventy has taught, “When we are out of
balance, we have a choice. We can delay making changes and experience the
tragedy of a failing family or the sorrow of losing our own spirituality; or we
can be attentive and continually nudged by the whisperings of the Holy Spirit
to make necessary adjustments. Seeking balance among the essential
responsibilities of life is preparatory to salvation.”
President
Boyd K. Packer of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles taught this idea when
he said, “Addiction has the capacity to disconnect the human will and nullify
moral agency. It can rob one of the power to decide.”
President
James E. Faust taught, “While some addictions require professional
clinical help, let us not overlook the spiritual help available to us through
priesthood blessings and through prayer. The Lord has promised us, ‘My grace is
sufficient for all men that humble themselves before me; for if they humble
themselves before me, and have faith in me, then will I make weak things become
strong unto them’ (Ether
12:27). Let us
remember that the power to change is very real, and it is a great spiritual
gift from God.”
Even though the
following questions apply to video games, we need to take them into
consideration when checking to see if any hobby or habit has become an
addiction.
· Do you play
compulsively?
· Do you play
for long periods of time (often longer than you had planned)?
· Once online,
do you have difficulty stopping?
· Do you play
as often as you can?
· Do you sneak
or violate family rules in order to play, even when facing punishment or loss
of privileges for doing so?
· When you are
not playing, do you obsess about the game, plotting and planning your next
opportunity to play?
· Do you
sacrifice real-world things for your online world?
· Is your
gaming negatively affecting your relationships with family members or other
non-gamer friends? For instance, if you are a parent, does it cause you to
neglect your children’s needs? If you are a child, does it cause you to
distance yourself from your parents and siblings?
· Do you
consider other online gamers (even those whom you’ve never met in real life) to
be among your best friends?
· Is your
school or work suffering because of the time and energy you spend gaming?
· Are you
having a difficult time deciding to serve a mission because of the extended
break from the game that will naturally result?
· Do you
neglect personal hygiene?
· Have your
sleep patterns changed since you became involved with online gaming? Are you
staying up extremely late or getting up in the middle of the night to play?
(Charles D.
Knutson, BYU Computer Science Dept, and Kyle K. Oswald, LDS Family
Services)
They further
state, “If your loved one plays excessively, to the point of neglecting
important aspects of his or her life (such as school, work, family life, church
attendance, and church service), intervention may be merited. Seek counsel from
priesthood leaders or professional counselors to know how best to approach your
loved one. Since every situation is unique, these people can be a valuable
resource as you prayerfully seek the Lord’s help.”
The key is to
seek the Lord’s help. As with any addiction, it is almost impossible to
overcome it alone. Whether the problem is with video games, TV, computer and
internet usage, or even pornography, we need help from family, priesthood
leaders, and perhaps even professional help to overcome the problem and take
back our lives.
The more that
electronic devices take over our daily lives, the more Satan wins by
sidetracking us from what is really important…the church, our families, and our
personal righteousness. Use these tools for righteousness. Use them to read
scriptures, study the gospel, do genealogy, gain a higher education, manage
your family and your time. Make each fleeting minute of every day useful.
Here are three of the ideas found in “Personal Time Management: One Key to a
Leader’s Effectiveness,” by Rex W. Allred:
Focus
on results. We often race at high speeds all day only to discover that we
have been doing things rather than getting things done. Keeping the end goal in
sight will enhance our capability to be effective rather than only quick.Keep a time log. If your time log reveals that you have not been spending your time effectively, make plans and commitments to change your behavior accordingly.
Set priorities. Figure out the best use of your time. Consider using a personal planner or smart phone to aid your efforts.
The challenge to better utilize our time grows continuously as we take on more of life’s roles and responsibilities. Seeking the skill of effective time management will strengthen your contribution to the Lord’s work and help you accomplish far more in life.
May we bring the
Lord into our lives as we seek him in prayer on ways to help us overcome and
improve. May we not only help ourselves, but those around us find the Savior
and have his spirit help us overcome addictions. May we make the most of our
precious moments here upon the earth, I pray. We love you and pray for you!
Love,
Valyn Tucker
1st
Counselor - Kanesville Stake Relief Society Presidency
